The Rikkaidai Assistant Girl Valentine's Special
by natashallen
Summary: One shot. Niou was doubting Hikaru's skill in making Valentine's chocolate so she decided to change his opinion... in a drastic way! Neechan... you're not planning to kill us, are you?


**The Rikkaidai Assistant Girl Valentine's Special**

Hikaru looked around her in an amused manner. _Everywhere_, from classrooms to the cafeteria, the toilet to the library, the computer room to lab rooms, the gym and every inch of the school grounds, she hears about this "Valentine's Day"! It's only early February! She overheard some of the girls in her class talking about how they plan to spend this whole week digging up some cooking books, so they could make the best chocolate for their significant others, or for the boys they have crushes on. She quirked an eyebrow, that's just so weird…

"A penny for your thoughts?" A soft and gentle voice said. Hikaru more or less jumped from her seat.

"Seiichi, Don't sneak up on me like that!" she scolded him. It was obvious she was just trying to save face for being startled so easily. Yukimura grinned. He's been spending his time watching the amused expression on the girl's face for a good while.

"Lost in thoughts, ne?" he smiled. "May I know what could have possibly forced you to make funny faces like that?"

"Funny faces?" Hikaru's eyes widened. She wiped her face and mouth frantically. "Did I drool?" how embarrassing!

Yukimura laughed. "No… You just went like this…" He furrowed his brow in concentration. "Then, like this…" He tapped his chin while staring at the ceiling. "And like this…" He shook his head and rolled his eyes comically. Hikaru burst out laughing. She had her _moments_ sometimes, Yukimura acting them out just made them funnier.

"So, want to share?" Yukimura smiled pleasantly, his calm and collected look back on.

"I was just thinking about how everyone's talking about Valentine's Day. Don't you think they're a little over excited? "

"Over… excited?" Yukimura's eyebrows rose. He pondered for a few seconds. "Now that you mention it… I don't think so… Everyone always talks about it every February."

"Really?" Hikaru looked puzzled. "Well, I do know that we celebrate Valentines… but not like this… It's like everybody is obsessed about getting the boys chocolates… "

"Haven't you ever celebrated V-Day before, Hikaru?"

"Not really… I haven't got a boyfriend to start with anyway." Hikaru shook her head. "Besides, Aya said V-Day was just … insignificant…" She chuckled. "Maybe that's because he doesn't have any girlfriend to give him anything."

"You don't have to have boyfriend or girlfriend to celebrate V-Day here." Yukimura smiled. "Valentine's Day is about giving something special to the ones you care for.They could be your spouses, boyfriends, girlfriends, best friends, and friends -anyone… It can be when girls confess their love to the one they… like…" Yukimura wrinkled his brows while trying to explain the whole thing.

"Hmm… I understand the concept but… I still don't know why they go through all the troubles just to make chocolates…"

"Well, if the chocolate was homemade, most people would appreciate it more."

"How about you, Sei?"

"I like any kind of chocolate, homemade or not, it's not a big deal… though I like it bitter, not too sweet."

"Hmm… I see…" Hikaru looked thoughtful. "Thanks Sei… You've enlightened me today!" She patted Yukimura's back, grinning.

"Anytime…" Yukimura smiled.

---------------------XX------------------

"You never celebrate Valentine's Day? I thought all girls love it!" Niou looked amused. They sat under the Sakura tree behind the school grounds. Hikaru had a Science textbook on her lap, while Niou was working on his English homework.

"Well, not every country has crazy Valentine's tradition like Japan…" She rolled her eyes.

"But it's such a shame! You could give away chocolates to everyone you want! How cool is that? "

"You just said that coz you're expecting free chocolates every Valentines, right? "

"Yeah…" he grinned sheepishly. "But Buchou still gets the most chocolates… I swear he receives more than a hundred chocolate boxes each year!"

"I can see why!" Hikaru smirked, the 'Seiichi-Sama Club' coming to mind. "Well, I guess you have a sweet tooth eh, Masaharu? I never thought Niou-the trickster-Masaharu actually likes chocolates!"

"Hey, _chocolate is food_ and I love food!" He pouted somewhat cutely, in Hikaru's opinion.

"I'm sure you'll get your share of chocolate, Masaharu…"

"You bet! I'm one of the most popular guys at school, I'm amazing!" He replied smugly.

"Yeah, yeah… you probably scare poor little freshman girls and they end up giving you chocolates as a peace offering." She said poking him in the rib.

"Why you!" He got Hikaru in a headlock and tickled her mercilessly.

"I- AHAHAHA _I'm sorry_ HAHAHA!" she screamed in-between fits of hysterical laughter.

"I'll let you go if you say the _password_!" He said while tickling her sides.

"AHAHAHAH! Niou- HAHAAA"

"Yes?" Niou arched his eyebrow suggestively.

"Niou- HAHA Masaharu HAA- HA stop it!!!"

"Come on!" He still tickled her. "Say the _magic_ words and you _free_!"

"Niou-Masaharu-is-the-most-gorgeous-human-being-ever-to-exist-on-this-planet!" She screamed all in one breath, tears of mirth flowing from the corner of her eyes. Finally, Niou let her go.

"You meanie-face!" Hikaru whined. Niou just chuckled.

"That's a real witty come-back!" He said with utmost sarcasm.

She pouted while trying to even her breathing. Damn, ever since the regulars knew she was so ticklish, they always used the dirty trick (AKA tickled her merciless) to their advantage. She was forced to memorize some _passwords_ to get away from the torture. Niou the gorgeous, Marui the genius, and Aka-chan the sexiest! She gagged at their _creativity_…

"Serves you right!"

Hikaru picked up her textbook again while pouting. "You should be careful not to mess with me, Masaharu-chan… Who knows what I could do to your chocolate…"

"You think that'll scare me? Niou grinned wickedly. "You don't even know how to make one! "

"I can too!" Hikaru flinched and then frowned. "Well, I can learn!"

"Yeah… and pigs fly! Remember when you burnt the lettuce when you tried to make salad? Who in the world does that?" He snickered. He knows that Hikaru couldn't cook to save her life. But what she did have were _three_ maids who can cook _for_ her…

"On second thought…" Hikaru tilted her head. "I don't think you're _worthy_ enough to taste my cooking… So I won't even bother to make _you_ any chocolate!"

"Keep telling yourself that." Niou flapped his hand weakly at her. Hikaru smacked him with her (quite thick and heavy) book. "Hey! Was that necessary?"

"Very!" He exclaimed rubbing his arm. She stuck out her tongue. "I think our lesson is enough for today." She stood, dusting her skirt and leaving Niou without another word.

"Oi! Are you mad at me? Hikaruu!"

-----------------------------XX-----------------------------

"Nee-chan…are you mad at Niou-senpai?" Kirihara directed his big bright eyes to Hikaru's. She lifted one eyebrow. She was studying all by herself in the library when Kirihara came to look for her.

"What would I be mad at him for? " She turned her attention back to her book. Kirihara sat next to her.

"Well, Niou-senpai said that he might have offended you…" Kirihara said carefully.

"No, don't worry… I was just a little miffed."

"Well, you can count on me to beat him up to a bloody pulp! -If you want..." he offered.

"Thanks, Aka-chan…"Hikaru closed her book and patted his cheek gratefully. "But I'm sure in the end he'd win and you would be the one sporting more injuries."

"Nuh-uh! Well, actually…" Kirihara shuddered. One-on-one fighting with Niou-senpai was just plain _stupid_. That guy outclassed many in the art of fighting! Or rather the art of rearranging ones face without going to the plastic surgeon! It would be a good idea to go to the plastic surgeon _afterwards…_living with a disfigured face wouldn't be easy…

"Nee-chan? If I may ask, why were you mad at him?"

"He doubted my cooking skills!" Hikaru wrinkled her nose.

"You can cook Neechan?" Kirihara was quite surprised.

"You doubt me too?" Hikaru glared at him.

"Oh… so you _can_ cook?"

"Ehmmm, well…Not _really_…" Hikaru fiddled with her fingers. "But you shouldn't underestimate my skill in learning something new!"

"O-okay…" Kirihara was nervous seeing steam practically explode from her ears. It was never good seeing her mad like that.

"Aka-chan! I have a great idea!" she grabbed Kirihara by the collar and whispered something to him.

----------------------------XX-------------------------

"This is the great idea?" Sanada had a baffled expression on his face.

"Yup!" Hikaru was smiling _ever_ so brightly. They, the regulars, were standing awkwardly in her apartment's kitchen. Hikaru invited them to her apartment after practice, and they were (kind of) being forced by Yukimura to come despite their reluctance. Well, who wouldn't be when they saw Hikaru all but grow horns, and fangs when she invited them _pleasantly_. But if Buchou said they have to go, well, they have to go!

"What the hell is this?" Marui lifted a plate of… something burnt. He sniffed it and almost gagged. "Ewww!"

"Hey!" Hikaru snatched it from Marui's hand. "This is my first experiment, don't you dare insult it!"

"Experiments?" Yanagi approached her and examined the… _thing_ in Hikaru's hands.

"Well, yeah…" Hikaru flushed a little. "I had Rika teach me how to bake chocolates…" (Rika is her maid)

"This is chocolate?!!" Yagyuu looked scandalized. The others were horrified too, apart from Yukimura who still wore that pleasant smile.

"I over-baked it a little okay!" Hikaru defended.

"Just say you burnt it…"Sanada deadpanned. Hikaru glared him.

"It was my first try you- you Argh!"

"So, these are your _other_ chocolates, Hikaru?" asked Yukimura before Hikaru could throw frying pans at Sanada or the others who insulted her (the others were ready to add their opinions/insults).

"Yup!" she brightened immediately. "You guys are lucky to be my first costumers! Come on, try them!"

On the kitchen's long table, there were many plates with many, many kinds of chocolates in different shapes, colors and… smells. Kirihara tried one of them, which looked rather decent and in the shape of a heart. Suddenly he felt his tongue burning.

"Oh God, what the _hell_ is that Nee-chan! It's so spicy!" Kirihara wailed, his eyes full of tears. Jackal offered him a glass of water and he downed it immediately.

"Ehehehe…" Hikaru laughed sheepishly. "I accidentally mixed some wasabi on it… I thought adding more sugar would help, but… well, I guess I was wrong!"

The regulars looked at the crazy girl with a fear in their eyes. She still looked over-excited so nobody dared to make a move since they valued their good health thank-you-very-much!

"What are you looking at? Masaharu, try this one!" She shoved a piece of chocolate, which was suspiciously coated with something creamy, into Niou's mouth. Unprepared, he swallowed it almost immediately.

His eyes bulged, "What the hell?!!" he ran to the nearest sink and spat it out. He gagged for a few seconds and rinsed his mouth with water while scratching his tongue. The others looked horrified.

"You Ok, Masaharu-chan?" Hikaru asked, slightly nervous, but it was coated in false sweetness. "I guess my goat milk-chocolate didn't turn out the way I planned." she dumped the rest of the chocolate into the nearest trash bin. "Or… maybe it's because the milk turned sour" She contemplated, mostly to herself

"WHAT?!" Niou nearly threw up again in the sink. Hikaru chuckled evilly. The others (always with the exception of Yukimura) were taking a few steps backwards. They needed to get away, and fast!

Suddenly the doors to the kitchen were closed and locked. Kirihara and Jackal tried to pry open one door, and Yagyuu tried the other door. But they were all locked. Some muffled chuckles were heard from behind the other side. It sounded suspiciously like Rika's and the other maids.

"Nee- neechan? Are you going to kill us?" Kirihara asked shakily.

"Don't be _silly_!" Hikaru laughed lightly. "I still need you guys to test out these chocolates… I don't want to give un-satisfying chocolates on Valentine's Day, do I?"

"So, we're your test subjects, like mice placed in mazes to look for cheese?" Yanagi paled.

"When you put it like that it sounds so…" Hikaru shrugged. "Whatever, Ren-chan, try this one." She raised another piece of chocolate to the poor boy. He shook his head vigorously. Like a little boy who didn't want to bathe after rolling in mud.

"Ren-chan, _this one_ isn't dangerous, now eat up!"

"Are you saying the _others _are dangerous?!!" asked Sanada in panic.

"Of course not!" Hikaru chuckled. "This one has peanuts in it! Go on, don't be shy… It's delicious!"

"She's nuts alright…" whispered Marui to Jackal.

Slowly, Yanagi opened his mouth and bravely took a bite of chocolate. He chewed… and _crack_! something was definitely wrong with the chocolate! He spat it to his hand, and to everyone's horror, the peanut turned out to be a pistachio! She didn't even throw away the nut shell! Ah, that's way it cracked painfully in Yanagi's mouth…

"Oops…" Hikaru laughed embarrassedly "I forgot to remove the shell… Sorry!"(she didn't look sorry at all!)

Yanagi was too speechless to say anything. And his teeth! Oh how they burned! Marui, Niou, Jackal and Yagyuu banged on the door frantically. But of course, it wouldn't budge. Sanada was ready to kick the door down, while Kirihara cowered in the corner. How he regretted being in this place (And involved in Hikaru's schemes!)

"Seiichi!" Hikaru turned towards Yukimura with a smile. "You haven't tried my latest recipe… I saved it just for you…_Wanna taste it_?"

"Sure!" Yukimura happily accepted the pink coated chocolate.

"NO BUCHOU, DON'T EAT THAT!!!!" all of them yelled simultaneously.

But too late, Yukimura has already eaten the chocolate! What is Yukimuras fate? Everyone waited in horror. One second, two…

"It's delicious!" Yukimura announced and taking another bite of the chocolate. All of them fell simultaneously. Hikaru grinned.

"Isn't it, Sei-chan? I got imported strawberry sauce all the way from Europe "

"That was… strawberry chocolate?" Marui's eyes twinkled in sugar-crazy mode.

"Yeah… high quality one I tell ya! Do you want it, Bunta-chan? I have a special one just for you!" Hikaru offered him a piece of chocolate layered with some red and green powder. Marui eyed it carefully before deciding to take a shot at it. He put it in his mouth and…

"Bleh! What the hell is this!" he coughed up the chocolate immediately and sent it flying to the trash bin.

"Tsk, tsk, Bunta-chan! It's a good one; I added imported carrot and celery special from America.You can't just throw it out like that!" Hikaru shook her head disapprovingly. The others sweat dropped. Carrots?! Celery?! Who put _veggies_ in _chocolate_?

"I hate vegetables!" Marui wailed and went to cower in the corner with Kirihara.

"That's enough Hikaru! No more chocolate! Do you want to kill us all?" Sanada bellowed sternly. He had to stop the _madness_ before… he becomes the next victim!

"Gen-chan," Hikaru's eyes watered. "You're… accusing me of wanting to hurt you? I… I… I'm sorry Gen-chan!" Hikaru wept and Yukimura embraced her, patting her back affectionately.

"Genichirou, I don't approve of your behavior!" The Buchou glared buchou-ly. Sanada gulped.

"I'm sorry Yukimura… ehem, I mean, sumimasen, Hikaru… I don't mean to upset you…" he bowed. Hikaru looked at him with teary eyes.

"You mean it?" she sniveled. Sanada nodded.

"So you… you don't mind trying out my chocolate?"

"I do actua-" Yukimura glared.

"I meant I, uh, don't mind… I don't mind at all!" Sanada was slapping himself inwardly. Hikaru brightened instantly. _'What happened to those tears, she was acting wasn't she?_' He fumed and was given a piece of frosted chocolate with some ketchup on top.

"Hikaru… Is this, _ketchup_?" Sanada poked the chocolate with his index finger. Hikaru nodded cheerfully.

"Yes! Come on, it's my masterpiece!"

"What kind of chocolate needs ketchup on it?" He looked horrified (nobody blames him)

"It's needed for the fillings."

"What filling?"

"Something good and imported!"

"And what is that?"

"Ah, just eat it and find out! You said you would try it!" She said with an accusing finger pointed at him. "Or is our great Fukubuchou _afraid of chocolate_?" she taunted him. Jackal shivered and inched closed to Yagyuu.

"Was she on crack?" he whispered to Yagyuu. '_That's a possibility_' thought Yagyuu before nudging jackal off him. He likes his personal space…

Sanada twitched. He glared at the chocolate, as if challenging it to reveal its filling. But of course that's just too much, isn't it? We can't just randomly decide to give Sanada x-ray vision powers, no matter how convenient that would be! At last, halfheartedly, he wrinkled his nose and took a bite. Then nothing, no response whatsoever, it was one of those 'Kodak moments'. HE WAS STUNNED.

"Hey… Sanada, are you alright?" Jackal waved his hand in front of the petrified Sanada. Some drops of ketchup fell from his mouth.

"Sanada?" Yagyuu shook his shoulder. Hikaru was smiling 'innocently'.

"Fufufufu… I knew he couldn't take camel meat… It was the good kind too, special delivery from Arabia! You don't eat camel meat-filled chocolate everyday!" Hikaru rambled whilst grinning like a lunatic.

"Hikaru, are you sure it was _the meat_?" Yagyuu questioned, his right hand was holding the so-called camel meat-filled chocolate up in the air while his left hand was pinching his nose.

"Errr…" Hikaru turned her head the other way guiltily.

"Hikaru, care to explain?" Yukimura arched one brow elegantly.

"Ahahaha…" she scratched her head awkwardly. "You got me there; it wasn't camel meat _exactly_… It's something… _from _the camel, he-he-heh…"

"HIKARU!!!" All of them (excluding Yukimura) screeched unceremoniously.

"It's camel intestines ok! Are you happy now?"

THUD! It was the familiar sound of a body gracelessly colliding with the floor.

"SANADA!!!!"

----------------------------XX-----------------------

Well, let's just say after the incident, nobody dares to insult Hikaru's notorious cooking skills anymore. The regulars have been carefully avoiding ever hurting Hikaru's feelings since _That Day_. Yes, the day where our macho, manly, masculine, strong, fukubuchou had passed out after eating the - censored - chocolate (they still haven't gotten enough control to say it without the urge to retch). When Sanada found out (after threatening our poor baby boy Akaya-chan) that it was Niou who triggered Hikaru's motivation in making the chocolate, the trickster was sent running 200 laps around the school (The school! Not around the court, mind you!). The following Valentine's Day… is for another story….

**THE END**

Hello minna!!

Gomen for the late update on the Rikkaidai Assistant Girl!

But no worries, I'll update ASAP!

As a treat, I posted this one-shot for you, I hope you like it.

Err… yeah, I know it's late for Valentine… but work with me Ok (grins)

Special thanks to J for the edited and up-graded version of this story (it's a lot better than before, you're a genius!)…. THANK YOU!!! (bows bows bows)

Thanks for reading and review OK minna….

Natashallen


End file.
